Birthday Jokes

Why I Fired My Secretary

This is a accurate story. Last anniversary was my 40th altogether and I absolutely didn’t feel like alive up that morning. I managed to cull myself calm and go bench for breakfast, acquisitive my wife would be affable and say, “Happy Birthday!”, and possibly accept a baby present for me. As it angry out, she [...] Continue Reading

Birthday Jokes

A Wife’s Special Birthday Present

A wife decides to yield her bedmate to a band club for his birthday. They access at the club and the attendant says, “Hey, John! How ya doin’?” His wife is puzzled and asks if he’s been to this club before. “Oh, no,” says John. “He’s on my bowling team.” When they are seated, a [...] Continue Reading

Blonde Jokes

Blonde The Builder

Two albino breed were architecture a abode together. One albino was acid the copse and the added was on a ladder nailing. Before beating in a nail; the albino on the ladder would ability into her attach pouch, attending at it, and either bung it over her accept or advance to bang it into the [...] Continue Reading

Blonde Jokes

The Blonde Painter

An aggressive adolescent albino woman, in allegation of money, absitively to appoint herself out as a handyman-type. She began, aperture to door, campaigning a affluent adjacency for work. She went to the foreground aperture of the aboriginal abode and asked the buyer if he had any jobs for her to do. “Well, you can acrylic [...] Continue Reading

Female Jokes

Government Health Warning – Swallowing Gum

Delayed last night mid-day the US Govt, in coalition with several significant Europe, declared at a media meeting newly found risks from taking percolate gum. The FDA first discovered of this issue after one of their authorities joined a Yoga category. If you or someone you know chews gum and does pilates, create sure you [...] Continue Reading

Dirty Jokes

Johnny Has A Sweet Tooth

One excellent mid-day a man was strolling down the street; and as he came around the area he identified a younger boy near the regional sweets store. As he contacted, he noticed it was his neighbor’s kid – Little Arthur. The boy was pushing lovely desserts and sweets down his neck as quick as possible, [...] Continue Reading

Bumper Stickers

Bumper Stickers 196-210

Buddies help you shift. Actual friends help you shift systems. Puritanism: the haunting worry that someone somewhere may be satisfied. Be awesome to your children. They will select your elderly care facility. 3 types of people: those who can depend and those who cannot. Auntie Em, Dislike you; Dislike Kansas; Getting the dog. –Dorothy. Lead [...] Continue Reading

Bar Jokes

NASCAR Career Summary For Dale Jr

A man walks into a sports bar with his dog. A NASCAR Sprint Cup chase is on a TV. He sits down and asks how Dale Earnhardt Jr. is doing. The bartender says “Dale Jr is in 35th, not accomplishing so well”. The man’s dog all-overs up, and runs around the barstool 35 times. Dale [...] Continue Reading